Monkey Eggs with Acne Weather Dear So and So…

Time for another Dear So and So…

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

Dude!  Could you be any flippin’ cuter this week?  When I asked you today if you were being a Drama King and you looked at me and said “grama – eeng?” I knew you were my son.  You make a Drama Queen Mama proud.

Also, I so love how you are kissing everyone you can get your lips on right now!  Dogs and stuffed animals included.  Although you don’t say much other than “car” and “what’s that?”, I know already that you have a huge heart.  It melts mine to think about it.

Love you SOOO much!

Mommy

——————————————–

Dear Eggs,

I am praying that at least one of you (fertilized of course) has taken up residence in my uterus this week.  The doctor says that is probably the reason I woke up in excruciating pain Monday night.  I hope he is right.

Trying to stay positive and hopeful,

Me

——————————————–

Dear all bloggers with a captcha,

Requiring someone of my incompetent caliber to type a captcha every single time I try to leave a comment is just cruel.  If my fingers and/or eyes worked a little better then I wouldn’t complain.  But since my fingers and brain are on the “outs” right now, it frustrates me to no end that after I have typed up my whole “über cool” comment, your captcha catches me typing one wrong letter and kicks me out to start ALLLLLLLLL over again.  If you love me, and I know you do, remove those captchas!

Kthanks,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Adult Acne… (again),

Ok, so I was nice before.  But now I am staring to get pretty peeved.  Placing that massive zit on my chin?  NOT COOL!  You suck, you suck, you soooooo suck!

Fed the hell up,

Your face

——————————————–

Dear Mother,

Please stop being a beyotch.  If you don’t want to talk to me, fine.  Making fun of me when you do talk to me and then refusing to tell your one and only daughter that you love her too when she says she loves you is pretty shitty.  The first ten times, I know it was your anger speaking.  But now?  CHILDISH!  Nnkay?  Get off your high horse.

Much love,

Your daughter

——————————————–

Dear ArkLaTex Weather,

Rain is supposed to be cozy and comforting and something that makes you grab a nice book and a blanket and sit by a window to enjoy.  YOUR rain on the other hand is flipping ridiculous here!  Will there ever be a rain drop to fall on this city when a SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WARNING has not been issued or will I ever hear thunder in this town without a closely followed TORNADO WARNING issued for the area?!?!  It’s so not funny anymore.  Let’s make a deal, ok?  I will promise not to complain when you rain if you promise to stop making me beg God to let me make it through another one of your nasty storms.  Deal??

Flustered,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Steelers,

You are going to rock this year.  I KNOW it!  Woot! Woot!

🙂

Your Fan,
Cass

——————————————–

Dear Readers,

You Rock!  Thank you for another wonderful week of reads and comments!

I do hope that you chose to participate in Dear So and So. Just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Thanks for reading!!

Xoxo

Advertisements

Dear So and So…

——————————————–

Dear Karen,

I know you are the “liaison” that I am supposed to speak to at Fertility Specialists of Dallas, however, you have a really shitty attitude and I have about had it up to here!  Please stop thinking the world revolves around you and learn a thing or two about CUSTOMER SERVICE.  Need I remind you I am giving your office my child’s college fund for the hopes of another pregnancy?  So, yeah, try to remember that next time I am being OVERLY nice to you even though you deserve obscenities and a smack.

Got it?

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Hubby,

You rock.  Seriously!  You are so amazing and I am so lucky to have you.  I know I am going through some serious mood swings right now and I know it isn’t easy.  I can see that look that you sometimes get on your face where your mind is deciding whether to tell me to shut the hell up (which is what I deserve) or being the sweet agreeable husband that I need lately.  I so love that you are choosing the later.

Love,

Your devoted, cranky, irritable, but very loving wife

——————————————–

Dear Baby Teeth,

Get on with it already!  My poor kid is now chewing on my poor couch!  Must you constantly grow?!?  I plead with you to just GET IN THERE already and give Monkey some peace.

Running out of Infant Midol,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Adult Acne,

It wasn’t enough that you drove me crazy over my teen years.  And then drove me bonkers as a young adult.  But to come back again in my thirties?  That is just true love right there.  Thanks so much for making me feel like a teenager again.  It is totally swell.

Seriously though?  Vacate the premises or Mama is going to get drastic.

Can’t really do anything about it except complain,

Me

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

I know you feel the need to be held by me 24/7 right now, and while I would LOVE to hold you always, there are just some things Mama can’t do with you in her arms.  Like vacuuming, driving, showering, making the bed, or trying to use the bathroom.  Although the latter, you really seem to think is a bonding moment.  It isn’t.  Just so you know.

Love you even though you are super needy and making me a tiny bit crazy right now,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Mosquito that bit me on the tip of my nose last weekend,

Thank you so much for your love bite.  However the huge swollen bump on my nose that most resembles a zit has made me feel like Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer all week.  Clearly I already have issues with my complexion (see above) so you aren’t helping matters much.  Not to mention my depth perception is all thrown off because I keep seeing a big red spot in my line of vision where my nose once used to reside.

Please mention to all your nasty mosquito friends that I will not take kindly to this kind of abuse any longer.  Why must you all feast on me like Thanksgiving dinner?  It may have been a little funny when you thought to bite me on my rear end so that I was forced to walk around scratching my butt all day.  And it might even have been a good giggle when you got me right on my boob so that I had to pretend to want to hug everyone, even strangers to get a little itch out of the deal.  But I assure you, this most recent event has been the final straw.  I will… probably do nothing… but you better be scared anyway.

Jerks,

Tasty Skinned Mosquito Magnet

——————————————–

Dear Poopy Diapers,

You are becoming more *gag* alarmingly *gag* disgusting.  Please stop.

Kay thanks,

The Diaper Changer

——————————————–

Dear Readers,

If you would like to participate in Dear So and So, click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Thanks for reading!!

xoxo