Posts Tagged ‘mosquito

31
Jul
09

Dear So and So…

Dear So and So...

——————————————–

Dear Karen,

I know you are the “liaison” that I am supposed to speak to at Fertility Specialists of Dallas, however, you have a really shitty attitude and I have about had it up to here!  Please stop thinking the world revolves around you and learn a thing or two about CUSTOMER SERVICE.  Need I remind you I am giving your office my child’s college fund for the hopes of another pregnancy?  So, yeah, try to remember that next time I am being OVERLY nice to you even though you deserve obscenities and a smack.

Got it?

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Hubby,

You rock.  Seriously!  You are so amazing and I am so lucky to have you.  I know I am going through some serious mood swings right now and I know it isn’t easy.  I can see that look that you sometimes get on your face where your mind is deciding whether to tell me to shut the hell up (which is what I deserve) or being the sweet agreeable husband that I need lately.  I so love that you are choosing the later.

Love,

Your devoted, cranky, irritable, but very loving wife

——————————————–

Dear Baby Teeth,

Get on with it already!  My poor kid is now chewing on my poor couch!  Must you constantly grow?!?  I plead with you to just GET IN THERE already and give Monkey some peace.

Running out of Infant Midol,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Adult Acne,

It wasn’t enough that you drove me crazy over my teen years.  And then drove me bonkers as a young adult.  But to come back again in my thirties?  That is just true love right there.  Thanks so much for making me feel like a teenager again.  It is totally swell.

Seriously though?  Vacate the premises or Mama is going to get drastic.

Can’t really do anything about it except complain,

Me

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

I know you feel the need to be held by me 24/7 right now, and while I would LOVE to hold you always, there are just some things Mama can’t do with you in her arms.  Like vacuuming, driving, showering, making the bed, or trying to use the bathroom.  Although the latter, you really seem to think is a bonding moment.  It isn’t.  Just so you know.

Love you even though you are super needy and making me a tiny bit crazy right now,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Mosquito that bit me on the tip of my nose last weekend,

Thank you so much for your love bite.  However the huge swollen bump on my nose that most resembles a zit has made me feel like Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer all week.  Clearly I already have issues with my complexion (see above) so you aren’t helping matters much.  Not to mention my depth perception is all thrown off because I keep seeing a big red spot in my line of vision where my nose once used to reside.

Please mention to all your nasty mosquito friends that I will not take kindly to this kind of abuse any longer.  Why must you all feast on me like Thanksgiving dinner?  It may have been a little funny when you thought to bite me on my rear end so that I was forced to walk around scratching my butt all day.  And it might even have been a good giggle when you got me right on my boob so that I had to pretend to want to hug everyone, even strangers to get a little itch out of the deal.  But I assure you, this most recent event has been the final straw.  I will… probably do nothing… but you better be scared anyway.

Jerks,

Tasty Skinned Mosquito Magnet

——————————————–

Dear Poopy Diapers,

You are becoming more *gag* alarmingly *gag* disgusting.  Please stop.

Kay thanks,

The Diaper Changer

——————————————–

Dear Readers,

If you would like to participate in Dear So and So, click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Thanks for reading!!

xoxo

Photobucket

Advertisements



Photobucket

about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!

Photobucket

my photography page:

Photobucket

my validation!

Photobucket
Advertisements