Posts Tagged ‘Chocolate

06
Nov
09

Chocolate Needy Dear So and So Letters of Intent

Dear So and So...

Letters of Intent

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Dear Huge Zits on my Face,

Apparently you missed the Memo.  You are supposed to be attaching yourself to a helpless teenager.  Not to my wrinkles.  Nnnkay?

Seriously.  This is getting old.

Feeling 13 again, and not a good way,

Cass

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Dear Chocolate,

STOP! Seriously! Stop tempting me.  Do you see what you are doing to my face?!?!

GAWWWWD!

You suck! (But taste oh so good)

Cass

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Dear Monkey,

Please.  For Mama?  PLEASE!  Start talking.  Not only am I worried about you not talking because of your age, but I am SERIOUSLY over the whining and grunting to get everything you want.  It’s making me grouchy.  So please.  TALK.  k?

Love you baby but I got a VERY short fuse,

Mama

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Dear Cass,

You are going to have a nervous breakdown if you don’t learn how to mellow out a little big.  You have been complaining of PMS for over two weeks now.  And even though it is possible, it’s getting a little OLD.  Get a fuse.  Go to Sams or Costco and get a HUGE one if you must.  But for all of us, get one!

That vein seriously looks like it’s gonna pop,

Self

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Dear Hubby,

Hope you enjoy your weekend away fishing.  Be safe and catch a lot.

Wishing I had the same draw the water did.

Disgruntled,

Wife

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Dear Stats,

Why am I suddenly only getting like 50 reads a day when last week I was getting over 200?

Starting to get a complex,

Cass

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Dear Readers,

Time to play along! To participate in Dear So and So just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page. To participate in Letters of Intent, click here to visit Julie, over at Foursons and grab one of those buttons too!

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Xoxo
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17
Aug
09

Things I have learned from my Toddler

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  • When you wash your bras (and that is totally what I look like in my bra, by the way, lmao), do not hang them to dry where your toddler can reach them.  Because when the doorbell rings, he will see this as the perfect opportunity to bring you said bras while he is also using them as a chew toy.  Your lawn person may respond like mine with Deer in the Headlights face and just say “ummmm… uhhh… ok then” and walk off.
  • Somewhere around 17 months of age, your toddler may decide that he no longer wants to sit still while you attempt to change his diaper.  This will most commonly occur when he has had a SERIOUS bowel movement.  Then the kicking, wiggling, and screaming will commence.  But he will wait until you have started to remove the diaper before the “freak out” because he wants you to think that he is actually going to hold still so that you are both not covered in yuckiness by the end of the diaper change.  Do not be fooled!! Use rope, rubber bands and/or duct tape if necessary.

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  • Anything that can be pushed around like a shopping cart will be.  This includes trash cans, boxes of any sort, laundry baskets (especially when trying to fold clothes out of one or trying to place sorted dirty clothes into the basket) and sometimes even an end table.  I advise against allowing the last if you have glass tables like me.
  • If there is an open soda can or beer bottle within a hundred mile radius, an 18 month old will find it and dump its entire contents on your new carpet.

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  • When your child tries to show you some chocolate that is on his finger from a recently eaten cookie, it’s best not to taste it unless you smell it first to decipher if the brown smudge is indeed chocolate.  This was brought to me by a friend’s experience. (Or was it?)
  • When your toddler comes up to you and starts petting your bare leg like a dog, it’s time to think about upping your personal hygiene

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  • Taking a toddler shopping at a Wal-mart (with half broken air conditioning) for 2 hours when everyone else in your town is also shopping there (and sweating and smelling) and then having to wait in line for another 35 minutes is not how I would suggest spending a Saturday afternoon in 95 degree heat.
  • Wash closely when your toddler is eating.  Otherwise you may be forced to fish an entire bowl of goldfish crackers out of his mouth at the Olive Garden in front of hundreds of people.  Complete with colored drool and screams of protest.

Well that is all the lessons I have for today 🙂  lol

What things have you learned from your toddler?

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I don’t usually blog about giveaways, but I wanted to let you all in on a really good one.  Go here if you are interested.

06
Aug
09

Chocolate Ranting Dust Bunny Lovin’ Dear So and So Friday

Dear So and So...

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Dear Readers,

Someone pissed in Mama’s Cheerios this week, don’t take it personal.  I am just a crabby pants.  Might have something to do with the humongous hormone surge coursing through my veins, but I am over it anyway.  Trust me so are others that are over it too, you aren’t the only one.  So bear with me on my rant today.  I will try to throw in some humor and niceties too.  Promise.

Love you for sticking with me,

Cass

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Dear Ovaries,

Today is the big day.  Even though I know you didn’t get the medicine you were SUPPOSED to get last night because the doctors in this po-dunk town are effing STUPID and didn’t give me enough, please, please, please let Mama get some good news today.

Much apprech,

Me

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Dear Fertility “Specialist”,

I am trying.  Like REALLY, really trying.  PLEASE. DO. NOT. MAKE. ME. SMACK. YOU.

Kapeesh?

Cass

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Dear UrbanDictionary.com,

Today when I looked up “Kapeesh”  in your database to see if I was spelling it right, I was pleasantly surprised to see that your definition shows The meaning is :If you don’t do this, your ass is mine.”  LOVE IT!!

You made my day,

Cass

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Dear Hubby,

Seriously?? Seriously?

Bout ta smack ya,

Your wife

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Dear Chocolate,

Why must you tempt me so?  Our relationship has gotten to a volatile state.  Your abuse is ruining my complexion and my love for you always keeps me coming back for more.  Please, for the love of me, remove your addiction from my brain. Eating an entire bag of your sweet, delicious peanut M&M’s is like 12318902512389057 calories, right?  So, please, I beg you.  Please.  Stop torturing me.  Please?

I will love you always,

Cass

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Dear Sean,

Thank you gobs and gobs for messaging me on Facebook.  You have made my brain go into “Melancholy Overdrive” and I love it.  Fifteen years (gah! we are getting OLD) is far too long to have not heard from you.  I am so glad we have reconnected.

YAY!

Cass

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Dear Barnacle Baby,

I know you need me now,  but I do hope this is a passing phase.  (so do the dust bunnies building up in our house because of your little “show” of affection lately) Making Mommy hold you all day every day isn’t going to do wonderful things for your self esteem, especially if this goes on till you leave for college.  Your Prom date isn’t going to want Mommy there.  Just something to think about.

Love you,

Mommy

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Dear Readers,

Thank you for putting up with me today.  I do hope that you chose to participate in Dear So and So.  Just  click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Thanks for reading!!

Xoxo

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about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!

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my photography page:

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tweeeet:

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my validation!

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