Archive for the 'Stuff that makes me giggle :)' Category



30
Oct
09

A Sexy and Musical Dear So and So Letters of Intent

Dear So and So...

Letters of Intent

——————————————–

Dear Glee,

I am pretty sure you love the pants off me, and that is why you hired Mark Salling who plays Noah.  Hope he doesn’t mind being in many future, and *ahem* past, naughty dreams of mine.

markshilling

I can’t be responsible if Hubby wakes up one morning soon with a Mohawk.  🙂 Oh yeah, who’s your Mama?

Rawwwr,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Hubby,

Thank you kindly for stopping at the grocery store last week and picking up some needed food items for me.  And thank you even more for going back in even after you had already paid to pick me up the newest copy of People so that I could read the article on Jaycee Dugard before the new issue of people came out that next day.

However, you will forgive my laughter and constant giggles when I walk by the kitchen counter and notice the “Country Music” edition of People that you got instead sitting there.  It was so kind of you, really it was, but I can’t help but laugh, me being the country music buff and all.  Lol

Now if only I knew some of the people this magazine is about.  Anyone wanna fill me in on some Country stars? *shrug*

Giggling,

The Wife

——————————————–

Dear Jill,

OMG I am so stoked for my Jesus Is Not Offended Wall Calendar!!!  I would be willing to bet my life savings that you will be able to retire off of sales of the new calendar.  You are so amazingly talented.  Your artistic skills can only be compared to that of DaVinci or Michelangelo.  Honestly, I think you put the two of them to shame.

Anxiously watching the mail for my prize,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Hubby,

Wednesday night, you fell asleep on the couch.  While I was typing *this* blog (planning ahead :)) you sat up, looked straight at me (or… maybe past me… anyhoo…) and you said “We will do it tomorrow night!” and promptly fell back down and into slumber.  I had to laugh.

Now, I am just trying to figure out what “doing” will be done.  Heh heh heh 😉

Oddly turned on,

The wife

——————————————–

Dear Nick Jr (formarly known as Noggin),

Usually I am totally irritated by all of your nonsense, even though Monkey seems to think you’re all good.  But this… this? is so frickin’ awesome!

Humming Three Little Birds a lot lately,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

I love that you are suddenly being all Mommy needy right now.  Yes that is selfish of me because you are usually a Daddy’s boy.  But I am soaking that shizzle UP!  I love how you want to be held all the time and how you always want to be on my lap.  One thing that I really enjoy is playing the “what’s that” game with you.  You know… where you point to my hair and say “wuzzat?” and I say “that is Mommy’s Hair” and you point to my nose and say “wuzzat?” and I say “Mommy’s nose” and you stick your finger in my eye and say “wuzzat?” and I say “OWE OWE MY EYE MY EYE!!” and you laugh at me.  Fun times.  Sooo… let’s keep playing that, but with less… intensity.  Nnkay?

Love you baby!
Mama

——————————————–

Dear Jon Gosselin,

Seriously?

I just threw up in my mouth,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Kelly,

Thank you for emailing me today.  You sent me the most hilarious joke I have heard!

It is a new take on the 3 little pigs nursery rhyme.

The Big Bad Wolf said,

I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down!

The three little pigs said,

Fuck off or we’ll sneeze on you!

Rolling on the floor,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Readers,

Time to play along! To participate in Dear So and So just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page. To participate in Letters of Intent, click here to visit Julie, over at Foursons and grab one of those buttons too!

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Xoxo

sign 102609

Advertisements
23
Oct
09

Take a BITE outta… wait… whaaaat? Dear So and So Letters of Intent

Dear So and So...

Letters of Intent

——————————————–

Dear Headache,

I have about had it up to *here* with you this week!  For the past 6 days in a row? Seriously!?!?

GO AWAY!

The Head

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

Why are you getting so aggressive with the girls this week lately?  Poor Jazz is going to rip your little arm off if you hit her again.  And poor Daisy runs anytime you even LOOK in her direction.  What’s up?

Just so you know, the growling is their way of telling you they don’t want you hitting them.  Nnnkay?

Feeling like a broken record repeating “don’t hit!”,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Toddler Clothing Makers,

Why is it that ALL of the pants I buy for my 20 month old son have a waist band big enough to stretch from her to Germany?  He is NOT abnormal.  There can’t be a whole lot of kids who can wear these pants without them falling down. Seriously.  I am baffled.  GRRRR

Irritated,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Monkey,

I know you run the show in this here house but, we need to get one thing clear.  Even though it is clearly your intent to live on Fruit Cups and Cheerios alone, you really can’t.  PLEASE eat something else for Mommy.  Please?

Love you baby,

Mama

——————————————–

Dear Spider that crawled up and took a big CHOMP outta my butt the other night,

Was this some lame attempt at voicing your attraction to me?  No? Oh.

Was this your way of giving me good blog material? No? Oh.

Was this your way of telling me that you knew the exterminator was coming and you just wanted a last bite before death?  No. Oh.

Was this you just doing what spiders just do naturally, you creepy little buggers?  Yeah, I thought so.

Not cool buddy, not cool!

Lamest joke teller of all time,

Cass

——————————————–

Dear Durex,

I love you for making this commercial.  I have seen it a gazillion times, but totally can’t stop watching it.

Rolling on the floor,

Cass

——————————————–
Dear Readers,

Time to play along!  To participate in Dear So and So just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.  To participate in Letters of Intent, click here to visit Julie, over at Foursons and grab one of those buttons too!

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Xoxo
Photobucket

14
Sep
09

A CheeseBall Daily Photo Blog

20090821-IMG_2157 copy

Yes, I really meant Cheese Balls!! 🙂  This was just for fun.

And yesssssss Carma this is for you!! lol  After a lot of pressure, err… nudging 🙂 here is the pic you have been waiting long for! 🙂

Have a great Monday all!

Photobucket

03
Sep
09

Things I have learned from my Toddler #2

wifflepink

My son has these colored wiffle balls that he loves to play with. You know the ones… the balls with all the holes?  (No they aren’t pink, that is just the only pic I could find.)  Anyshizzle… he puts them up on the end table next to my chair and grunts at me.  He wants me to spin them like a top.  He wants them spun ALL the time.  And if you don’t spin the green one, the red one, the white one, the purple one AND the blue one, then he will scream and proceed to throw the balls at your head.  You MUST spin the balls.  *eyeroll*

plug_ears

Any toy that makes noise will be among the top five favorite toys in your toddler’s life. The toy with the most annoying noise will be #1.  Especially if it is a loud annoying lawn mower toy that your son feels he must RUN through the house pushing.  The loud thumping and music and annoyance of it all can be easily drowned out with wine.   (Although if pregnant, like myself, and not allowed to drink such sanity inducers, then just close your eyes and pretend you have the whole wine bottle in your hand.  It helps.  Seriously.) *grin*

Nightmares can rouse a Mommy from a “dead to the world” sleep and can only be cured with cuddles.  Mommy will try not to cry along with you, I know you hate that.  Ok well I will try not to cry.

Supernanny-757431

Timeout is sort of a joke.  I have been watching that Super Nanny.  I need that chick to come to my house and show me a thing or two.  I am sick of being laughed at.

When your toddler is sitting on your lap and sneezes, and a foreign substance comes FLYING out his nose right into your face, try desperately not to heave him across the room as you make a mad dash for the toilet.  If you have annoying nausea hormones that make you want to vomit at the mere sight of snot, then I suggest wearing a hazmat suit.  Mine is on backorder.  🙂

Climbing is not an art.  Bruises, cuts, scraps and bumps are normal.  On toddler and on Mommy.  Get used to it.

IMG_1865 - Copy copy

No matter how bad the mood or how upset you may be, one giggle from that little perfect person can make your world a better place.  Instantly.

I am thinking of making this a weekly thing.  You know with class participation and everything.  What do you think?  Would anyone want to participate?  Let me know either way what your thoughts are.

01
Sep
09

Much less Whiny Random Tuesday Thoughts

randomtuesday

If you want to play along with Random Tuesday Thoughts, go here to get the widget and add your name to Mr. Linky.

Show of hands, how many people liked my mushy, whiny, pity party yesterday?  Yeah didn’t think so.  I don’t much care for it either.

I tend to jump to my emotions and the focus in on them like a crazy person.  In this case yesterday, I couldn’t sleep and half assed wrote that blog at 3 in the morning.  I was feeling those things but wasn’t taking into regard the feelings of others.  I do that, though.  It isn’t good and I am not making excuses.  It’s just one of the shitty flaws in my character.  Lani said something that really stuck on me.

…the loneliness is natural, not necessarily anybody’s fault.. in times like this I think we just need to cut each other some slack.

That is something I most definitely didn’t do.  I focus on the need of the moment.  This weekend I wanted to be held and needed attention.  Since I didn’t get that I failed to see all the other things that were done.  I am so glad that most of my readers saw that.  It was wonderful to read the comments and even the few emails I got.  So thank you.  I see it now and will spend as much energy as I can to prove that I was wrong in my words yesterday.

Moving on to more randomness….

Starbucks apparently has rolled out Pumpkin Spice today, which I just read on a Facebook post.  I seriously want to drive there to get a decaf Pumpkin Spice Latte like RIGHT. NOW!  Weird?  I think not.  I will be heading there shortly.

Monkey is sitting on my lap while I type my blog on one monitor and he is watching “Baby Einstein: On the Go” in the other one.  I feel like I only have half a computer.  And in my current sideways sitting position, I know I only have half a lap.

This Saturday is our anniversary.  Well it is one of the three anniversaries that I shamelessly make my hubby participate in.

They are:

  • February 7, 2003 Our first date/the day I knew I was in love.
  • December 26, 2003 The day we said “I do” at the Douglas County Courthouse.  (a perfect day)
  • September 5, 2004 The day we had a beautiful wedding in the gorgeous Rocky Mountains.

They are all days that I want to celebrate.  Lucky for me, he seems to agree.  So Saturday will mark five years since my Dad helped my drunk ass walk down the aisle giggling the whole way drunk as a nervous skunk walked me down that aisle.  It will be five years since we said our vows to each other.  It is going to be a great day!

Monkey keeps yelling “CARRRRRRR!!!” and “VRRRROOOOOOOMMMMM” at the screen.  And if I don’t “vroom” back to him, he grabs my face and turns it to him as if to say “Focus Mom! I am talking to you!” I secretly LOVE it when he does that.  Especially in public or even more so when I am trying to get an annoying solicitor to leave my front porch while he is perched on my hip. 🙂

Per my husbands request I will be starting a daily photo blog.  I am planning on putting it on this blog page as well, so I hope that works out.  I used to send out a daily photo email to family and friends.  I am not sure why I ever stopped.  I guess I just didn’t have the time.  But I miss it and I am going to get back into it.  They wont ALL be baby shots, but lets face it, he is my favorite subject.  Some will me old and some will be new.  I hope you enjoy and comment on the shots you like and don’t like even.  I think. LOL

Today there was a high of 81 degrees.  This kind of weather is what I have needed.  It makes it bearable to be here in this humid town.  The 116 heat index heat is not my friend.  Ugh.  Hopefully this will convince me to do some more walking with the baby around the neighborhood and park.  Of course that will depend on when my doctor pulls me off of this semi-bed rest.  Oh well, it will happen when it happens right?

That is my new motto.  It is what it is. Go forth and forget the small shit that gets in the way.  That is my new goal. 🙂

Have a great evening.  Sorry for the late post.  Also, sorry I am not having time to read everyone’s blogs.  Having Gram in town doesn’t free up a lot of time for computer puttering.

Anything new and exciting to report? Comment with a blog link if you want me to get to it.  Sorry again for the lack of reading time!


Photobucket

27
Aug
09

Honest Shit…err Scrap Award :)

Sorry… I had to mess with the title.  It made me laugh.

Honest_Scrap_Award

So I got this cool AWARD from Brandie of The Rudy Family Rukus on Tuesday.  This would be my first award.  As well as my first knowledge of the possibility of an award.  I haven’t had time to prepare a speech but… first I would like to thank all my fans… oh …lol.  Just kidding.

I haven’t had a chance to get back to it until now… Sorry Brandie!  To read the original blog from Brandie, please go here.

The rules are to pass this on to 7 bloggers who I feel are honest in their blogging and list 10 honest things about myself. So here goes!!

So here are my 10 honest fun facts.  Some are already known.  I am not secretive about much.  Clearly.  So here is my list.

1.  I am oddly afraid of creepy crawly spiders.  Actually all creepy crawly things.    Example:  Today, while sitting  in my living room, I saw something slither on the floor.  Freaking out I called my neighbor cause hubby was still at work.  Bob (neighbor) came running over with his HOE in hand ready to slaughter the anaconda in my living room.  Soooo… turns out maybe my eyes need to be checked.  It was a teeny tiny lizard.  TEENY TINY!  And then my Gram sat giggling as I let out a scream because the little bastard chased me!  (Ok, well maybe he was just running for his life, but he was running for his life in MY direction.)  Anyhoo, somehow we scared the crap out of him and he ran under the couch, never to be seen again.  I am waiting for him to make his appearance still.  *shudder*

2.  My housekeeping skills and more so my laundry skills for sure leave something to be desired.  I am much more inclined to play with Monkey or get on the internet than clean.  This isn’t to say that my house is gross because it isn’t by any means.  It just may have a bit more dust than most.  And growing up in a spotless house that we cleaned from top to bottom twice a week, I have a lot to live up to in my housecleaning head.  While my house doesn’t need an overhaul or that Peter Walsh from Oprah to show up, I would for sure love to have some time with Molly Maids. *grin*

3.  Even though I say I need to watch my potty mouth, the truth is I don’t think I will ever stop cursing as much as I do.  Some things just sound better with the eff word in front of them.  It makes me happy to curse even though I know it makes me look like… well I dunno what I look like but oh well.  For some reason I don’t typically curse on my blog.  Don’t be fooled my mouth is terrible.

4.  I have been watching the same soap opera for 22 years.  I have hardly missed any episodes.  The thing is, I kinda hate the show.  But I can’t stop watching it.  All My Children seems to have made its home in my soul.  *shrug*

5.  I think about sex more than anybody I have ever met or known.  I don’t know why because I was never promiscuous or anything.  As a matter of fact, I can count my lifetime of sexual partners on one hand.  But I think about it so much that I have started to hate the fact that I think about it as much as I do.  It is consuming.  Also, I am a pervert.  But I guess that goes hand in hand.  Not like weird creepy have to register pervert, I mean like open to all fun kink kinda pervert.  And that part I don’t regret.

6.  I love tattoos.  I only have four but I want tons more.  I have at least 5 more that I have already planned out and can’t wait to get.  My 80 year old body should be smoking with all that faded ink.  Sexxxxxy!

7.  My biggest fear is death.  Death of myself and death of my loved ones.  I can’t bear the thought of losing more of the people I love.  The thought makes me ill.  And I am so fearful that I will die before I have been able to do all of the things I want to do.  Ugh.

8.  I love animals so much that I want to adopt all of the homeless pets in the world.  It irritates me to no end when I hear about people breeding their dogs and cats.  Do they not know how many animals out there need homes?!?!  It makes me SICK.  I wish that I could adopt them all and I would let them all sleep in my bed with me and cuddle at night.  And they would know they were loved.

9.  Everyone thinks I am a really great photographer, but the fact is that I am just wingin it all the time.  I sort of skipped over a lot of skills that I really needed.  But nobody seems to have noticed.  Someday I hope that I will be able to take some classes to perfect my craft.

10.  I am doing what I have wanted my whole life to be doing.  I am a stay at home Mom.  I love every minute of it.  And not to mention my son is like he most perfect kid in the whole world!!

And the 7 8 people (cause I couldn’t settle on 7) that I am awarding this blog award to are…. DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!! (drumroll please!)

Wicked Courtni

Cammie at House of No Sleep

Kat at 3 Bedroom Bungalow

Jill Pilgrim at Pilgrim Congress

The Vegetable Assassin

Captain Dumbass of Us and Them

Kristina at Pulsipher Predilections

Mama Kat’s Losin It

Please check out each of their blogs.  I love to read them all!!  Have a great Thursday!


Photobucket

21
Aug
09

Monkey Eggs with Acne Weather Dear So and So…

Dear So and So...

Time for another Dear So and So…

——————————————–

IMG_2068 300x300

Dear Monkey,

Dude!  Could you be any flippin’ cuter this week?  When I asked you today if you were being a Drama King and you looked at me and said “grama – eeng?” I knew you were my son.  You make a Drama Queen Mama proud.

Also, I so love how you are kissing everyone you can get your lips on right now!  Dogs and stuffed animals included.  Although you don’t say much other than “car” and “what’s that?”, I know already that you have a huge heart.  It melts mine to think about it.

Love you SOOO much!

Mommy

——————————————–

Eggs

Dear Eggs,

I am praying that at least one of you (fertilized of course) has taken up residence in my uterus this week.  The doctor says that is probably the reason I woke up in excruciating pain Monday night.  I hope he is right.

Trying to stay positive and hopeful,

Me

——————————————–

captcha

Dear all bloggers with a captcha,

Requiring someone of my incompetent caliber to type a captcha every single time I try to leave a comment is just cruel.  If my fingers and/or eyes worked a little better then I wouldn’t complain.  But since my fingers and brain are on the “outs” right now, it frustrates me to no end that after I have typed up my whole “über cool” comment, your captcha catches me typing one wrong letter and kicks me out to start ALLLLLLLLL over again.  If you love me, and I know you do, remove those captchas!

Kthanks,

Cass

——————————————–

zits

Dear Adult Acne… (again),

Ok, so I was nice before.  But now I am staring to get pretty peeved.  Placing that massive zit on my chin?  NOT COOL!  You suck, you suck, you soooooo suck!

Fed the hell up,

Your face

——————————————–

smiley-face-tongue

Dear Mother,

Please stop being a beyotch.  If you don’t want to talk to me, fine.  Making fun of me when you do talk to me and then refusing to tell your one and only daughter that you love her too when she says she loves you is pretty shitty.  The first ten times, I know it was your anger speaking.  But now?  CHILDISH!  Nnkay?  Get off your high horse.

Much love,

Your daughter

——————————————–

tornadowarning

Dear ArkLaTex Weather,

Rain is supposed to be cozy and comforting and something that makes you grab a nice book and a blanket and sit by a window to enjoy.  YOUR rain on the other hand is flipping ridiculous here!  Will there ever be a rain drop to fall on this city when a SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WARNING has not been issued or will I ever hear thunder in this town without a closely followed TORNADO WARNING issued for the area?!?!  It’s so not funny anymore.  Let’s make a deal, ok?  I will promise not to complain when you rain if you promise to stop making me beg God to let me make it through another one of your nasty storms.  Deal??

Flustered,

Cass

——————————————–

Steelers Square (1 of 1)

Dear Steelers,

You are going to rock this year.  I KNOW it!  Woot! Woot!

🙂

Your Fan,
Cass

——————————————–

you rock

Dear Readers,

You Rock!  Thank you for another wonderful week of reads and comments!

I do hope that you chose to participate in Dear So and So. Just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page.

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Thanks for reading!!

Xoxo

Photobucket




Photobucket

about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!

Photobucket

my photography page:

Photobucket

tweeeet:

Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.

my validation!

Photobucket
Advertisements