It is time for another “Not me” Monday. Time where I make it clear the things that did Not happen to me in the last week. Feel free to click on the link above to read other “Not Me” Confessionals… errr… Not really.
It was not me that has been sick all week and not able to talk. Of course this did not occur while Monkey and Hubby were also sick all week. No way.
Lemme tell you how not fun that was. That’s code for: It was HORRIBLE.
It was not me who went through 3 boxes of Kleenex in 6 days. And it was not me who whined and pouted when I had to use toilet paper this morning to blow my nose. Maybe I should get one of these…
It was also not me who cheated and went and bought a Battery Operated Nasal Aspirator to use on the baby since he doesn’t seem to blow his nose on cue yet.
**Take note: The Battery Operated Nasal Aspirator will be here by renamed the Booger Vacuum.
It was then not me who, while trying to convince Monkey that the Booger Vacuum was not trying to suck out his brains, used it on myself as demonstration.
It was TOTALLY not me who then realized.. ‘Wow! This Booger Vacuum really works!’ And it was soooooo not me who has since used the Booger Vacuum several times.
(Hope you already had your lunch… lol)
It was not me who got all the Christmas presents wrapped yesterday and either boxed up for shipping or nestled under our Christmas tree.
Oh ok… that really wasn’t me. That was hubby because it is not me who wraps like an idiot.
If *I* wrapped the presents, it would look something like if you blindfolded a drunk 2 year old and then had him wrap all your presents after tying both of his hands behind his back. That or CrapWrap.
And no, that does not mean that I endorse slave labor for your 2 year olds. Even I know to offer them beer first. Gawww. *eyeroll*
So all of our presents are looking GORGEOUS under the tree and it’s all thanks to my lack of being a proper Mom/Wife. Can you hear the sadness in my voice? Uh huh. Thought so.
Here was the conversation at the dinner table last night.
Hubby: Monkey, you need to watch Daddy and learn to become a champion gift wrapper like me.
Monkey: <baby babble>
Hubby: Yes, it is a skill you will require later in life, especially if you marry a woman like your mother. <gives me a look>
Me: Yes son, your wife will have you trained in no time, just like Mama trained your father.
It was not me who is SOOOO behind on blog reading that I am quite SURE that I have lost all of my readers. *pout*
Here again for your viewing pleasure is the winning photo:
Seriously this made me feel like a million bucks. Out of 486 entries, I was ranked in 4th place! That to me is so awesome. And I even got the awesome badge of honor of which I placed on my sidebar –>
It was not me who totally is too lazy to post a Daily Photo Blog too. So here is a Daily Photo for you to smile about.
Wow that was super easy. Maybe I will do that from now on! Because I am not lazy. No way, not me.
Ok… that’s really all I got today. I am still running on only half my cylinders. *yawn*
Have a great Monday!!!