Lord have mercy, we travel to Colorado today.
First a 2 plus hour drive in the car from Texarkan-kiss-my-assa to Little Rock. With an impatient toddler and an impatient Mama. Then wait to board a flight a couple hours later. With an impatient toddler and an impatient Mama. Then fly to Houston in a plane with no jungle gym or balls or TV’s. With an impatient toddler and an impatient Mama. Where we then have a 2 hour and 5 minute layover. With an impatient toddler and an impatient Mama. Then another flight to Denver. Again with no jungle gym or balls or TV’s with Yo Gabba Gabba screaming on them. With an impatient toddler and an impatient Mama. Then FINALLY we land in Denver International Airport. But that is just the beginning because by now it is after Monkey’s bedtime and he already skipped naps, because he refuses to sleep anywhere but in his bed. And Mama is on the verge of a mental breakdown. Then we have to wait for our luggage, which DIA typically unloads around 42.5 hours AFTER arrival, and then make the drive to my mothers house, an hour away. ON.NEW.YEARS.EVE. With THE.CRAZIES. Oh yeah. The DRUNK crazies. Should be fun. So it will only take us 11 of our 16 day vacation to actually travel THERE.
Can you tell I really look forward to traveling? Can you tell I am still a total grouch puss and NOBODY, not even ME wants to be around me right now? Can you tell that the next time we speak, I MAY be in a padded cell?
So I pray…
Bob grant me the serenity to not kill any fellow travelers when they take up too much arm room on the plane, fail to look where they are going while walking through the airport, or fall asleep in the aisle seat when I have a poopy toddler sitting on my very full bladder. And accept the things I cannot change, like… everyone else can suck my big toe cause I am having a shitty day and am STRESSSSSSSING out about traveling.
Maybe I should just call the fellows in the white coats to come pick me up now.
Pray for me too, k y’all?
Oh and I almost forgot… HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!