I *am* a judgmental bitch…

I like to believe that I am not a judgmental person, but even according to my husband, I apparently am.  *shrug*

So it occurred to me today upon reading a blog of a fellow Mommy that I am judgmental about one thing for sure.  I am judgmental of other Mom’s.  All Mom’s, even my own.  From blog Mom’s, to Mom’s I know in person, to random Mom’s I see in the grocery store.  No Mom is safe.  Nope, not even YOU.

For example, I am judgmental of the Mom in the checkout line of the grocery store the other day.  Her adorable little boy was looking back and smiling at me and when she noticed, she SMACKED the crap out of the back of that kids head and said “How many times I got to tell you! Quit starin’ at that white lady!” <– Honest to Bob direct quote people.  Serious.

Like… I don’t even have the words.  But one thing that *did* cross my mind at that very moment?  Grabbing that kid and asking him to come live with me.  Ayup.  I should have done it too.  Bet he would have said yes.

So what did I do?  Cause I am a judgmental bitchy bitch?  I looked at Monkey who was sitting in the cart in front of me and said “Don’t you worry son, Mommy will NEVER treat you like that.  I promise.” And expecting her to turn around and kick my ass, I braced myself, and all she did was shift her weight to the other foot.  Like all obvious and ohmygod like.  You know what I mean?  And then I got walked out by a guy grocer in case she was waiting to run me over in the parking lot.  LOL

But I do judge other Mom’s.  I see things that they do and decide if those things are something I want to do or how to do it better or different.  And this is not to say that I don’t learn some great things from really terrific mothers, because I do!  Lots!  But regardless of whether they are good things or bad things, I judge them.  I judge whether or not they are things that I deem appropriate for my family and my parenting.  I weigh the positives and the negatives and make a decision either way.

I am sooooo judgmental about Moms.  And I am actually totally ok with this.  It makes me a better mother.  It forces me to try at think of all of the things that I wouldn’t think of if I wasn’t a judgmental crazy lady.

Call me what you want, but I am totally ok with it.  *nod*


I saw this today because Molly aka: my FAVORITE photographer of all effing time posted it on her Facebook.  She rocks.  (You MUST check out her website Luminaire Images.  She is my inspiration.)

Ok…watch this because it totally made me cry.  I am such an emotional weenie lately.  (It’s pretty pathetic actually) but watch watch watch!!

Are you judgmental?  What is something that you have been judgmental about?  How did you/do you deal with it?

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Click here to view today’s Daily Photo Blog… It’s all about the guitar pajamas


19 Responses to “I *am* a judgmental bitch…”

  1. November 11, 2009 at 8:57 am

    I am sure that I’m judgemental, but what comes to mind right now is kind of the “flip” side. I feel like people are judging me left and right. “Plasti-City” where we live (Dallas, TX) has a neighborhood/area of town that is predominantly wealtlhy, and though we are no where near qualified to rub noses with those people, our church is smack dab in the middle of it, and everything I do is near or in that community. So, I constantly feel like I have eyes on me, even unloading my groceries!? I’m a bit neurotic I think.

    • 2 Big Mama Cass
      November 11, 2009 at 3:35 pm

      Neurotic? Perhaps. Exactly the same as me? Ayup. *nod* So I am ok with it if you are. 🙂

      ps… Dallas is only 3 hours from me. I am in Texarkana.

  2. November 11, 2009 at 10:31 am

    I’m very judgemental, but when it comes to motherhood, I always give mom’s the benifit of the doubt. Motherhood is a tough gig, and I feel like most of us are doing the best we can to the best of our ability most of the time. We all have off days and those seem to be the days where everyone is watching, ya know?

    I always make snap judgements, though. I almost always know if I like someone within the first ten minutes of meeting them, and I rarely change my opion.

    • 4 Big Mama Cass
      November 11, 2009 at 3:37 pm

      Interesting perspective. 🙂 I TRY to give other moms the benefit of the doubt but I am not that great at it. *sigh*

  3. November 11, 2009 at 10:48 am

    I just have to start by saying that the video and Molly’s photography is a.MAZ.ing!! I aspire to be that talented! 🙂

    I try really hard to not be judgy but I know there are times in my life that I fail. But I think everyone sees things and think I could use this or that or none of it at all in my life. I just try not to think their way is right or wrong, its just right or wrong for me. Hitting your kid though and saying what she said to her child was a moment I too would have judged…That’s was absurd!

    PS. I am glad to see she didn’t try anything funny in the parking lot! Good thinking to walk out with someone else ~ I might have hid out in the store a little longer until I knew she had pulled away.

    • 6 Big Mama Cass
      November 11, 2009 at 3:52 pm

      Isn’t she though? She is so fantastic.

      Yeah I should have stayed in the store a while, especially in this town. I did think about it but I opted to go. *shrug*

  4. November 11, 2009 at 11:21 am

    I think women are just judgemental towards other women in general, but I have heard that when you become a mom, it’s gets amped up.

  5. November 11, 2009 at 5:45 pm

    disclaimer: i have no children. but i totally get what you’re saying about “judging” others. i feel that you can learn more about yourself, your boundaries, etc from watching how others handle situations. i have a whole list of things “i’ll never do” based on my father’s bleckiness alone. we’ll see how that goes 🙂

  6. November 11, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    I will be first to admit that I judge people by how the act and what not. I am not scared to say it either. I am this way and so are a lot of people. I think in the long run it can make us better people and I know that it has helped me get over some of worries and concerns in life.

  7. November 11, 2009 at 6:22 pm

    She smacked her child in the head for being friendly? OK, now I need a Kleenex!

  8. 15 Rebekah
    November 11, 2009 at 9:31 pm

    I guess I am the same way then because I watch other moms and do the exact same thing. Now that I have a job as a TA, I watch my kids’ parents when they interact with the children and I am able to see how that interaction makes or breaks their entire day. I seriously think some people should be required to pass a class and get a parenting license!

  9. November 12, 2009 at 1:24 am

    I think it sounds like you are judging their actions, not necessarily them as a whole person, or a mom- and I do that too, I think it’s kind of natural to do that. We learn who and how we want to be by seeing other people’s action and how they affect other people; some people we aspire to be like, and others, we pray we NEVER turn into. Some people might see my (ab)use of the 5 second rule and shake their head over it, but hopefully they wouldn’t think I’m a crappy mom because of it. Now THAT would be judgemental:)

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about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!


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