28
Oct
09

It’s time for some BIG changes around here…

I have been reading all these amazing blogs for quite some time.  I love to read them and although I am not a profound writer (hah!) or anything, I do get at least four or five readers a day.  LOL

My blog is supposed to be a place where I can truly be me.  ME all the time.  365 days of *me*  Me on a stick.  Me with a side of gravy.  ME ME ME ME ME ME ME.  Get it?

And lately… I haven’t been me.  I have been trying to be who people want me to be.  I don’t say certain things because I don’t want to offend.  I don’t speak my mind because I don’t want to hurt feelings.  I am just not ME.

For one thing, my mouth is bad.  I curse.  I curse because I LIKE to curse.  I curse because it feels good.  I curse because I have since as long as I can remember and because it just makes me, me.  But you may notice, especially if you know me in real life, that I very rarely curse if at all on my blog.  People comment on it a lot actually.  How my blog is a “cleaner” version of me.

I even stopped saying “Oh my God” because I received an email from one reader who still reads my blog (or maybe after today will not) with the request that I change it to “Oh my goodness” because saying God was offensive.  I changed it because I didn’t want to be offensive.

Today, I had an epiphany!

I am ME!  And if someone who reads this blog doesn’t like it, then I say, hey, this is *me*.  If I read a blog that I don’t like, do you know what I do?  I don’t read it again.  Ayup.  Good strategy don’t you think?

If someone doesn’t want me to talk about sex, or say God, or say fuck, then I say, it’s mighty time you hit that big red X at the top there because this is the new me.  Well the old me, just new to you.

When I met Hubby, one thing that really drew me in was that he didn’t care what ANYBODY thought about him.  He was the one person that I had ever met who didn’t just say they didn’t care what people thought.  He really didn’t care.  As long as he was happy and making the people he loved and cared about happy, then he didn’t care what anybody else thought.  In 24 years, I had never seen anything like it.

He has changed me and brought about a new me.  Whenever I ask his opinion on how I should handle any situation, from the mundane and silly, to the HUGE and life changing, he most always replies with some variation of the same sentence.  “Just be you babe.”

From today forward, this is me.  Hi, how are ya? Nice to meet ya.

This is the ME I am.

The grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed, OCD, stay at home Big Mama fumbling through life.  This is me.

And that is awesome.

🙂

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28 Responses to “It’s time for some BIG changes around here…”


  1. October 28, 2009 at 1:21 am

    YES! Now you have stepped out of your blogging diaper into some “I’m a Big Kid Now” blog pull ups!

    Good Girl.

    Fuck anyone who tries to mold your blog into theirs. If they want some censored God damned G rated blog to read, how about:

    1: google blog search for other blogs
    2: Write the God damned blog yourself.

    I am so sick of people not accepting others for all of them. Faults and all.

    I support you and all of your perfect flaws.

    • 2 Big Mama Cass
      October 28, 2009 at 1:34 am

      You are seriously the bomb! seriously! and I don’t even care if nobody says that anymore cause guess who does still say it? ME!! LOL I love you girl! Muah!

  2. October 28, 2009 at 2:08 am

    You go girl! (says the person who deleted ALL family off FB b/c she was tired of the fallout and now stands back and acts all tough) 😉

    One day I wanna be cool like you.

    Until then, I will battle my inn…..you know what? Fuck it. Woo-hoo! xoxoxo

  3. October 28, 2009 at 2:08 am

    Good for you, woman. I’ve been in a similar boat and nowadays I just think “fuck it, I’ll say what I want because it’s my blog and it’s me.” and I do. And I swear a lot too so hey. I’m down with that. 🙂 Burn that blog bra! Say whatever you feel like. It’s liberating.

  4. October 28, 2009 at 2:21 am

    It’s difficult to understand how, overtime, you take into account what your readers want, rather than what drew them in, in the first place – and that is: you. We all fall victim to the trap of losing ourselves for a moment or two and wondering, “hmmm… if I go there… what will be the end result…?”

    I keep a good many things inside, because I have to, because they are not my things to tell, but sometimes, I want to write a blog to people I see out in the world who think they know what they don’t and I’d like to put a mirror up to them and show them exactly how they act and show them how they explain away their behaviour as acceptable, when it’s not. I don’t, because they won’t listen to me and even if they did, it would just start a huge war that so.isn’t.worth.my.time. (I save them for FB venting sessions, though – so much the better….)

    I know things I do and say get kicked around by people I don’t like… I know that people I could care less about talk smack about me behind my back about things they don’t understand and furthermore, I know they talk about what I write, my Sexy Saturday Night blogs in particular. But, I write those because that’s what’s in my mind. I write about “sex” when I get the inclination, because I am so.damn.tired of so many people thinking it’s shameful. It’s natural and beautiful. Sex improves your skin tone, your happiness, it is a great workout, and it’s a way humans show affection. I don’t advocate promiscuity, but I do advocate healthy sexual relationships and I do advocate that parents talk with their children about sex as soon as possible and in a non-shaming way.

    In the end, it’s the other person’s issues that need to be worked on and addressed, not yours. Welcome back to the “this is MY blog, MY name is on it, not YOURS, so I’ll say anything I damn well please” club… It’s a wonderful club with a LOT of great bloggers… you included.. ;o)

    • 10 Big Mama Cass
      October 28, 2009 at 9:59 am

      Bethany. You.Fucking.Rock. Seriously! And I sooooo love your Sexy Saturday nights. What an amazing comment! Every word is PERFECTION! Thank you!

  5. 11 jenn
    October 28, 2009 at 3:38 am

    hehe. fuck fuck fuck. lol. lmao.

    i took a script writing course once a long ass time ago. the key thing in that class was “know your audience”. everything i turned in had red circled words with red words beside that read things like “too offensive”, “are you a jerk?”, “re-write, to your audience, not yourself”. i was really pissed and told my mom to fuck that class. i wasn’t going back. it’s the same at school now. in my communication class, we had to do a lot of speeches. we could write what we wanted….. but still… we had to focus on the audience. who were we speaking to, what would appeal to them.. and so fourth. i hate it! i don’t want to HAVE to appeal to anyone. i just wanna be myself and if they can’t dig then they can get out. or we can have one hella fun debate.

    thanks for deciding to be you now!!! =)

  6. October 28, 2009 at 9:17 am

    Good for you- be you and don’t apologize:) Too many of my inlaws read my blog for me to be completely me, so you kind of have to read between the lines to get the whole me on my blog:) But I respect anyone who can really NOT care what anybody thinks. If someone doesn’t like it, they don’t have to read it. But I have a feeling you will gain a lot more readers than you will lose that way.

    • 16 Big Mama Cass
      October 28, 2009 at 10:04 am

      I know what you mean. Luckily, I am not nearly exciting enough for most of my family (and extended in-law family) to read my blog. Although they do know it is here. So at times I will need to be a little careful. But that’s ok. 😉

  7. October 28, 2009 at 9:42 am

    i can’t fucking wait. 😉

    i don’t really edit “me” on my blog, but I will edit “me” in comments.
    i say it’s your blog, if they don’t like what you say, how you say it, then they will stop reading.

  8. 19 pixiedreams8
    October 28, 2009 at 10:20 am

    I like you! And I am new to your blog but I like that you are going to be you & I have to say you and I have a whole lot in common. I will be sticking around! And you know what I totally find myself censoring myself for fear I may offend someone too but I am going to take you lead and stop trying to please and just be *me*!! 😉

  9. October 28, 2009 at 11:30 am

    I censor myself to some extent, but I’m still more edgy than a lot of Mormon bloggers. I’m still true to myself, but I do clean it up because people I work with read my blog, etc. I think it’s find to find somewhere in the middle. I don’t need to talk badly about family members or people I work with in order to stay true to myself, or curse every other word.

    • 22 Big Mama Cass
      October 28, 2009 at 1:19 pm

      I understand. I just need a place that I can be me. I censor myself enough in my life. This is the one place I am going to choose to be ME. Ya know?

  10. October 28, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    It’s about fucking time LMAO!!!

    ahem…

    I started out talking like I do in real life on my blog. I figured if people couldn’t handle the words I typed they probably shouldn’t read me. I cuss like a damn trucker in real life. I can only be who I am.

    I am glad you have decided to be who you really are.

  11. 25 Cyndi
    October 28, 2009 at 1:56 pm

    Good for you. Standing up for yourself is the best feeling. Let the potty mouth begin!!!!!

  12. October 28, 2009 at 2:54 pm

    i was just having a convo about this with erin (bloggingisfordorks) eerily similar. anywho, i fear the wrath of chuck’s family if they were to read it so i’ve told exactly nobody about it except pretend internet people. so, good for you! and keep up the good work being you! braver than me 🙂

    • 28 Big Mama Cass
      October 28, 2009 at 7:44 pm

      haha! All of my Chuck’s family has access to it but I am not nearly interesting enough for them to read any of it. 🙂


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about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!

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