***Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!
Welcome to another TMI Thursday! If you are related to me and/or don’t want to read a fairly detailed story involving me and naughty things, don’t read. You have been warned.
Four score and seven years ago… err… wait. That’s another story. LOL
Let’s just say MANY years ago… but not *that* many cause I am only 21, ahem, I was spending a relaxing, romantic weekend with my ex. We had a beautiful cabin in Estes Park, overlooking a beautiful stream, surrounded by the beautiful mountains. The room we rented had this huge Jacuzzi tub inside and all the luxury of a honeymoon suite. Very romantic right?
Our first day there, we were enjoying the room and sitting on the couch talking. One thing led to another and I was the recipient of some oral goodness on the couch. Then of course oral fun leads to intercourse fun and viola, you have all the makings of a sexy romantic moment, right?
Until… you start to notice you are feeling… how shall I say? Sticky?
Let me attempt to set the scene. I am lying on my back. He is on his knees, bent over at the waist, head laying on my shoulder after he has… had his ‘hoorah’ so to speak.
I have noticed that I am feeling the weird sticky feeling that I mentioned earlier. Sticky. Not quite a good feeling. And then it hits me. “Where is your gum?!?!?!” after I notice that he is no longer chewing it.
Guess who forgot to take the gum out of his mouth and then forgot it was there AND THEN consequently got it stuck all over my girlie parts?!?!?! Ahh yup!
So we are both COVERED in florescent blue chewing GUM!!! It is strung all over us and all over the couch. Neither of us were going for the Brazilian look at the time, so you can imagine when I say it was stuck… It was STUCK! Don’t judge, it was a LONG time ago and to be honest, I don’t even know if that look was invented yet! LOL
So we both are laughing hysterically, be in more of an angry “oh my effing lord, how could you forget you had gum in your mouth??” and him more of a “oh shit, she is going to kill me now” sort of laugh.
So there we are both sitting in the huge hot tub, not to enjoy a lovely bubble bath together, but to try and get the GUM OFF! *eyeroll*
How is that for romance???
Make sure you head over to LiLu’s place to read other fantastic TMI stories!!