24
Sep
09

Care for some sticky sex? TMI Thursday

TMI Thursday
***Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!

Welcome to another TMI Thursday!  If you are related to me and/or don’t want to read a fairly detailed story involving me and naughty things, don’t read.  You have been warned.

Four score and seven years ago… err… wait.  That’s another story.  LOL

Let’s just say MANY years ago… but not *that* many cause I am only 21, ahem, I was spending a relaxing, romantic weekend with my ex.  We had a beautiful cabin in Estes Park, overlooking a beautiful stream, surrounded by the beautiful mountains.  The room we rented had this huge Jacuzzi tub inside and all the luxury of a honeymoon suite.  Very romantic right?

Our first day there, we were enjoying the room and sitting on the couch talking.  One thing led to another and I was the recipient of some oral goodness on the couch.  Then of course oral fun leads to intercourse fun and viola, you have all the makings of a sexy romantic moment, right?

Until… you start to notice you are feeling… how shall I say?  Sticky?

Let me attempt to set the scene.  I am lying on my back.  He is on his knees, bent over at the waist, head laying on my shoulder after he has… had his ‘hoorah’ so to speak.

I have noticed that I am feeling the weird sticky feeling that I mentioned earlier.  Sticky.  Not quite a good feeling.  And then it hits me. “Where is your gum?!?!?!” after I notice that he is no longer chewing it.

Oh.

My.

Gawwwd.

Guess who forgot to take the gum out of his mouth and then forgot it was there AND THEN consequently got it stuck all over my girlie parts?!?!?!  Ahh yup!

So we are both COVERED in florescent blue chewing GUM!!! It is strung all over us and all over the couch. Neither of us were going for the Brazilian look at the time, so you can imagine when I say it was stuck… It was STUCK! Don’t judge, it was a LONG time ago and to be honest, I don’t even know if that look was invented yet! LOL

So we both are laughing hysterically, be in more of an angry “oh my effing lord, how could you forget you had gum in your mouth??” and him more of a “oh shit, she is going to kill me now” sort of laugh.

So there we are both sitting in the huge hot tub, not to enjoy a lovely bubble bath together, but to try and get the GUM OFF!  *eyeroll*

How is that for romance???

Make sure you head over to LiLu’s place to read other fantastic TMI stories!!

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41 Responses to “Care for some sticky sex? TMI Thursday”


  1. 3 Jennifer
    September 24, 2009 at 10:57 am

    I think all I can say right now is LMFAO!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA That is hilarious!! You poor thing!

  2. September 24, 2009 at 11:21 am

    OMFG. OMFGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. September 24, 2009 at 11:29 am

    Wow! This will make me never want to chew gum ever again.

  4. September 24, 2009 at 11:35 am

    Us guys are always gummin up the works, eh?

  5. September 24, 2009 at 11:38 am

    okay. You win.
    T.M.I.est story ever.

    even grosser that when Hubby changed my tampon for me cuz I was too ‘incapacitated’ to do so.

  6. September 24, 2009 at 12:33 pm

    Not that I anticipate this happening to you in the future, because I’m sure one time is enough for you to look at your husband (and hopefully, last sexual partner) and ensure that he has removed any substances that may cause stickiness, but, just in case you need to know for future reference (or if anyone else needs to know, for future reference), you should be able to get gum out less painfully with the use of vegetable oil (or canola or olive, whatev is lying around your kitchen pantry).

    But, uhmmmmm…. LMAO, didn’t he think to remove the gum? Oh, wait… he’s a guy.. ’nuff said…

  7. September 24, 2009 at 1:02 pm

    omg, this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read in regards to tmi…HAHAHHA. lOVE IT.

  8. September 24, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    At least he didn’t pluck it off your mabel and pop it back in his mouth. 🙂

    Hilarious!!!

  9. September 24, 2009 at 2:08 pm

    OK, so I didn’t read it. But on the positive side, I will still respect you tomorrow morning.

    😉

    Have an AWESOME day!!

    Amanda

  10. September 24, 2009 at 3:24 pm

    aannnd now my vagina is all scared. great! 🙂

  11. September 24, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    That is classic… I don’t even know what to say to that.

  12. September 24, 2009 at 9:22 pm

    Eek! Now you’ve given me a permanent fear of chewing gum! 🙂

    Seriously, that is so funny — now, anyway. I’m sure that at the time, it was awful.

    So LOL but you have my sympathy. 🙂

  13. 29 olivejude
    September 24, 2009 at 10:49 pm

    Ok, this will sound like I’m just trying to bond blindedly or something. But I promise this same thing happened to me! I have never told anyone and when I started to read it, I was relieved to think that it has happened to everyone else too. But then, it seems as it has happened to no one else.
    I also was too young to groom much. He never did know. It was horrible. I found it agter I went back home. To mom and dads!! Not a good situation!!

  14. September 25, 2009 at 12:52 am

    LOL!! That is awesome! You can’t make that stuff up! Wow.

    So I’m guessing it’s the Telly Savalas look from here on out?

  15. September 25, 2009 at 5:12 am

    I have never read anything like this in my entire life … I laughed, I cried, … I thanked God it didn’t happen to me!

  16. 35 Denise!
    September 25, 2009 at 11:13 am

    WOW!!!! TMI…I was warned but curiosity got the best of me. LOL

    That is funny. How do you forget to toss the gum before going downtown? lol

  17. September 26, 2009 at 3:16 am

    Okayyyyyy I readddd it. And I’m still grossed ouuttttt. Ew ew ew. As Bugs Bunny would say “What a marooon” 😛

  18. October 12, 2009 at 8:06 pm

    Seriously? And you let this one get away? For the record I will always think of you when I am chewing my neon gum.

    I just thought of a funny {not a good one though}…

    Ready?

    It kinda puts a new meaning to ‘gumming it’ when referring to oral sex 🙂

    Thank you…I’ll be here all night.


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about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!

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