I have all these blogs that have been bouncing around in my head. Things I want to get on paper. And yet when I sit down to write them my brain goes blank. Is that weird? Well I can tell you it is most annoying . Grr.
I am working on a good TMI post for tomorrow 🙂 Should have you all giggling pretty well. So look forward to that and bear with me while I do a little griping.
Today I am sort of having this little pity party for myself. I am feeling all emotional and wondering if things are going to work out with this pregnancy. I am scared, but trying to remain hopeful.
Part of what is frustrating me so bad is that I feel like the doctor, Dr M, I have here in Texarkana is pretty much a moron. I just don’t get good vibes from him. I had to start seeing him because my infertility specialist, Dr G, who is based in Dallas, works with Dr M here in Texarkana.
Usually, or at least in my past, I have had an ultrasound tech do all of the ultrasounds on me. Someone who is very familiar with Ultrasound machines and who is trained exclusively in reading and deciphering them. Dr M does his own ultrasounds. In my head I am guessing this is an attempt to save money. Makes sense. Well it would make better sense if I felt that Dr M actually had extensive training in administering the ultrasound.
The problem is that I don’t think he has a clue. I will be laying there and he is all up in my bidness with that HUGE probe scanning my innards, and he always has this look on his face like… “uhhh… ummm… uhhhh, whats that? Uhhhh” It is *not* very reassuring.
The first time he actually was able to find the gestational sac. (last Tuesday the 15th) it only happened after about 15 minutes of him searching and saying there was no sac. It was when I tried to move to reposition myself because he was STABING ME IN KIDNEY being too aggressive that he said, “Oh wait! I think I see something” and then had the nurse prop my hiney on a few towels for a better look. Apparently my position helped.
He was about to let me leave thinking that I had no gestational sac and that I didn’t have a viable pregnancy, because he couldn’t FIND the sac!? Looks pretty darn clear to me on the screen!
Isn’t there a procedure in place for ultrasound techs to scan the entire uterus? It isn’t that big people! It’s like the size of your fist! So, SERIOUSLY! How does he miss it?
So then this last week he is scanning around up in there trying to find something, with that typical dumbfounded look on his face and I have to remind him “Don’t you want me sit on those towels so you can get a better look?”
Dr M: “Oh! Yeah let’s try that.” Like he came up with the idea all by himself.
Then as you know he wasn’t able to find a heartbeat and he said he “thinks” I am measuring at 5 weeks and 5 days. This just leaves me thinking… Does this guy really have any effin clue??
He doesn’t deliver babies anymore. And I am starting to understand why. Hubby says he was probably drunk all through medical school and cheated his way through it. I am starting to think he might be right.
So with all of this frustration I have, I called Dr G, the specialist in Dallas. This guy I trust. He knows his shit and he doesn’t beat around the bush. (Pun not intended… or was it? *evil grin*)
Anyhoo, Dr G says that he hasn’t known Dr M for very long and that he was approached my Dr M to do a remote partnership so that the patients in Texarkana would have access to a Fertility Specialist. Otherwise, they do not.
After I tell him about all of the red flags I am seeing, he says he wants to see me in person and that he will be willing to work with any other doctor I choose in Texarkana, so that I don’t have to see Dr M anymore. Yay!!
I have an appointment to see Dr G on Friday at 3PM. He makes the 3 plus hour drive to Texarkana once a month to see the patients he has here. I am very anxious to see him. I am sure he will be doing another ultrasound to let me know what his opinion is. Since this guy does this EVERY DAY and this is his life, I am feeling much more confident that he can tell me what the actual diagnosis is.
Dr M never gives me any details or information on anything. We always have to dig it out of him and still don’t feel we get nearly enough. Things are NOT that way with Dr G.
I am totally stoked! Friday cannot come soon enough! FINALLY we should have some answers. I NEED TO KNOW!!!
Thanks for listening to my rant. 🙂