oh the pressure!!

ok so the pressure of my first post is nutty! i don’t know why i am letting myself get worked up over it. CLEARLY nobody but me will be reading this. so shit Cass, back off yourself woman! he-he write what you feel…. ok then… here goes

so i am awake and writing this because i can’t sleep. sometimes my mind refuses to relax and let me sleep and just decides to go 1,923,854,019,857 miles per hour. needless to say… it makes my sleep vanish. i sometimes wonder if it will just explode from overuse. just like an overheated old truck engine. who knows. guess time will tell.

the baby is sleeping soundly in his crib, with a soft snore. it’s so cute, i could cry. i wish he would get to feeling better soon and get over this terrible cold. i wish I would get over this cold soon and get to feeling better. now darling hubby is sick too. super.

we are trying to have another baby. it took us 5 years to make my perfect son and now 7 months into trying for baby number 2, i am already starting to debate throwing in the towel. hubby thinks i am becoming obsessed. maybe i am. i like to think of it more as focused. anyone with PCOS can agree that what i am feeling and going through isn’t that far fetched.

i think i am going to like keeping this journal of sorts. cool cool

that wasn’t too lame for a first attempt at myspace blog freedom… me likey!



4 Responses to “oh the pressure!!”

  1. December 20, 2008 at 6:03 am

    Good luck with baby making. I have to lose about 20 lbs before
    i can even THINK about trying to get pregnant again! Also, send my free toaster (oh I posted that on your myspace already) ok, well I can use a toaster anyway!

    Oh and don’t feel bad. I can’t sleep either. My left arm is hurting WAAAYYY too bad.

    • 2 bigmamacass
      December 20, 2008 at 6:08 am

      I am not going to stress about the weight. I am way more anxious to have another baby. Plus, I never know how long it will take. Jimmy took 5 years. I know it won’t take that long this time, but I don’t want to take the chance.

      umm… the toaster is… umm…. it’s in the mail 🙂

      what the heck did you do to your left arm??

  2. 3 Kelli
    December 21, 2008 at 2:29 pm

    Try to relax about having another baby. If you try to hard it wont happen. These thing will happen when you least except them. Just love your self and everything will follow.Hope to see you in CO soon.

    • 4 bigmamacass
      December 21, 2008 at 2:52 pm

      thanks Kelli!! unfortunately… because of all the fertility intervention that goes into me getting pregnant and then staying pregnant, it is not easy for me to relax 😦 i try but your right… i do need to try harder

      i will 🙂

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about moi…

Hi, my name is Cass. I am married to an amazing man who loves me unconditionally. I’m a stay at home mom to a rockin’ 2 year old boy who I call Monkey. I have an 12 year old step-daughter who lives in another state. We miss her daily. We also have two fur babies, Daisy and Jazz, who keep us on our toes. They are awesome!

I am a complete goofball, a photographer and a constant out loud thinker. I am a grammar challenged, vulgar, cursing, sex obsessed Big Mama fumbling through life. Among other things, I battle PCOS causing infertility, Bi Polar, Anxiety and OCD.

Currently I am riding the fertility roller coaster in an attempt to make Monkey #2. This blog is about a little of everything. I hope you enjoy. Read at your own risk!


my photography page:



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