HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!
I had this whole speech prepared for my Thanksgiving post but I have turkey on the brain. NomNomNom!
I am so thankful for my life today. And all that is in it.
Have a fabulous day everyone!!!
xoxoxo
…my stepdad hadn’t gotten sick?
Would my Mom be happy now? What would my sons name be? Would I have gone to that Christmas party in his place and met my husband?
…all of my past pregnancies had worked out?
I would have 6 kids with a 7th on the way. But would any of them be my perfect Monkey?
…we had stayed in Denver and decided not to move to Texarkana?
Would we still be living in a tiny apartment and sending Monkey to daycare each day?
…my ex hadn’t been such a douche?
Would I have still left him and found the love of my life?
…the guys at the plant hadn’t seen a sap while I was pregnant?
Would I still have taken Daisy home with us even after Hubby protested?
Watching this Flash Forward lately has me thinking. Some people really believe that our life is a pre destined set of events. I don’t know that I believe that. Sometimes maybe I do a little but for the most part I really don’t.
I have always said that everything happens for a reason. I really believe that. Not because of some pre-mapped life but because I think that everything makes something else occur. If any of the what if’s above had happened, then my life wouldn’t be where it is right now. It would be changed and different.
Would I have missed the opportunity to meet my husband if my step dad hadn’t been too sick to go to the Christmas party because of Chemo?
If I hadn’t had miscarriage after miscarriage, would I even be with my husband now if I had 3 kids with my ex?
Would I be able to afford to stay home with Monkey each day if we hadn’t taken the opportunity to move here?
It all boils down to 3 very simple statements.
I have a wonderful sexy husband that would do anything for us.
Our son is truly one kick ass baby boy.
Our two fur babies will always have my heart.
This is my family. Even if it is in this town that I hate, this is my family. And if any of those what if’s had come to fruition, would I be in these shoes now? It’s scary to think that I wouldn’t be.
What events could have kept you from where you are now? What are you truly thankful for?
Click here to view today’s Daily Photo Blog… Sliding Daily Photo Blog
The lovely DC Princess does a weekly blog called I LOVE Fridays. I was inspired by reading her posts each week to write one similar last week called *LOVE*.
I so enjoyed doing the *LOVE* post that I think I might make it a regular event. Not sure yet but we shall see. It won’t be on a specific day because, well I have too many days devoted. And I just can’t commit to that kind of pressure. HAHA
I won’t however be restricting myself to only “Things” today like I did last time. Just whatever comes to mind. Yay! (say Yay, you know you want to) 
Here goes….
I *LOVE* that my ass is all healed!! YAY!!! (what a freakin’ nightmare that shit was!) SHEEZ!
I *LOVE* that I got soooo many comments, emails, phone calls and messages from people telling me how much I was missed last week! I was shocked and honored. And now I have a big head. Yay!!
I *LOVE* my Jacuzzi bathtub. Yay!
I *LOVE* that we got all of the shopping done for Thanksgiving today! No more crazy crowds. Yay!
I *LOVE* that I got awards from AMAZING bloggers this week. Thank you Carma Sez! Thank you Stuperhero Extraordinaire! And a very belated thank you to MommyBrain and Rudy Family Rukus! All are great, please check them out. Yay!
I *LOVE* that someone rushed out of Wal-Mart with such hunger to getiton that they just whipped ripped their “Ecstasy” Trojans out of the box and left the box in the parking lot. Yay!
I *LOVE* that I stopped to take a picture of the empty Trojan Box thinking ahead that I just had to share my jealousy excitement with all you poor, unsuspecting readers. *grin* Yay!
I *LOVE* Entourage!! I just started watching it and have made it through to the middle of season 4. I can’t believe I ever missed this show!! It is sooooo good! Yay!!
I *LOVE* that the weather is finally getting cooler. Wearing long pants is much more socially acceptable when you go 4 weeks without shaving. Haha Yay!!
I *LOVE* that December is so close now I can taste it! Because it means TWO things that I *LOVE* are coming. #1 The holidays! (and my house gets uber awesome decos for the holidays) And #2 our next round of injections!! Yay!
I *LOVE* these Suds. If anyone knows how I can get in touch with them so that they can come to my shower and entertain cheer me on I would surely appreciate it! Yay!
I *LOVE* Saying YAY!!!!!
Click here to view today’s Daily Photo Blog… Innocent Daily Photo Blog
We all know I am a TV junkie. But this is not a blog about TV or my unbalanced obsession with the electronic box in my living room.
I LOVE watching Brothers and Sisters on ABC. But lately I am having a really rough time watching it.
Kitty McCallister played by Calista Flockhart, has Cancer. Or more specifically, she has Lymphoma. I have so much trouble dealing with Cancer or watching someone go through that, even if it is just acting on television. It just hits too close to home for me to be comfortable. And then even though I love watching, my brain is begging me to turn off anything showing the dreaded “C”.
My fears are not born out of me being crazy. Ok, well maybe some of them are. But this fear, the fear of Cancer, is experience based.
Some of you who have followed me from MySpace have already read this blog. I hope that you will take a quick moment to read it now and come back.
My stepdad, Jim, was an amazing man. He was an amazing father who loved unconditionally. We were lucky to have him in our life. But then he got Cancer.
He was sick for two and a half years and then he died. Just like that a father, a husband, a son, a brother, an uncle, a man, was gone.
Cancer did that. I was there when he took his final breath. It’s a moment that I wish I could banish from my memory forever. But no matter what I do, when I close my eyes, there it is. It was horrific. I hated living through it and I never want to live through it again.
They say you never know what you’ve got until it’s gone. Sometimes, it’s true. But then sometimes once you lose something you grow this irrational fear. And even though you haven’t lost another someone, that fear overwhelms you. That fear that you ‘could’ lose them.
I don’t have a fear of myself getting Cancer. And I even had a brush with cervical Cancer a few years ago. But I am not scared of getting it. I don’t know why. My fear is that someone I love will get it. Someone that I need. Someone that I don’t want to die. And any time I hear of someone, anyone, fictitious or otherwise, having Cancer, or God forbid, dying of Cancer, I freak out. My brain goes crazy with fear.
Watching this show brings it all back to me. It’s horrible. Just watching it, puts this ache in my stomach. Watching her go through having cancer, watching how her family is dealing with the news. Even watching her going to chemo. Ugh. I want to turn it off. But I don’t want to miss the show.
Death on TV or Film does the exact same thing. There I am transported back there. That feeling of loss is like a fresh wound all over again.
I wonder if it will always be this way. Will I always cry when someone on the screen gets cancer or dies? Will it ever get easier? Cause I gotta tell you… it has been almost 6 years and it doesn’t feel a day later than January 21, 2004. *sigh*
What is your take on this? What affects you in the Media?
Click here to view today’s Daily Photo Blog… Sidewalk Chalk Daily Photo Blog
I like to believe that I am not a judgmental person, but even according to my husband, I apparently am. *shrug*
So it occurred to me today upon reading a blog of a fellow Mommy that I am judgmental about one thing for sure. I am judgmental of other Mom’s. All Mom’s, even my own. From blog Mom’s, to Mom’s I know in person, to random Mom’s I see in the grocery store. No Mom is safe. Nope, not even YOU.
For example, I am judgmental of the Mom in the checkout line of the grocery store the other day. Her adorable little boy was looking back and smiling at me and when she noticed, she SMACKED the crap out of the back of that kids head and said “How many times I got to tell you! Quit starin’ at that white lady!” <– Honest to Bob direct quote people. Serious.
Like… I don’t even have the words. But one thing that *did* cross my mind at that very moment? Grabbing that kid and asking him to come live with me. Ayup. I should have done it too. Bet he would have said yes.
So what did I do? Cause I am a judgmental bitchy bitch? I looked at Monkey who was sitting in the cart in front of me and said “Don’t you worry son, Mommy will NEVER treat you like that. I promise.” And expecting her to turn around and kick my ass, I braced myself, and all she did was shift her weight to the other foot. Like all obvious and ohmygod like. You know what I mean? And then I got walked out by a guy grocer in case she was waiting to run me over in the parking lot. LOL
But I do judge other Mom’s. I see things that they do and decide if those things are something I want to do or how to do it better or different. And this is not to say that I don’t learn some great things from really terrific mothers, because I do! Lots! But regardless of whether they are good things or bad things, I judge them. I judge whether or not they are things that I deem appropriate for my family and my parenting. I weigh the positives and the negatives and make a decision either way.
I am sooooo judgmental about Moms. And I am actually totally ok with this. It makes me a better mother. It forces me to try at think of all of the things that I wouldn’t think of if I wasn’t a judgmental crazy lady.
Call me what you want, but I am totally ok with it. *nod*
Oh!
I saw this today because Molly aka: my FAVORITE photographer of all effing time posted it on her Facebook. She rocks. (You MUST check out her website Luminaire Images. She is my inspiration.)
Ok…watch this because it totally made me cry. I am such an emotional weenie lately. (It’s pretty pathetic actually) but watch watch watch!!
Are you judgmental? What is something that you have been judgmental about? How did you/do you deal with it?
Click here to view today’s Daily Photo Blog… It’s all about the guitar pajamas
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This is one of the best blogs I have read in FOREVER. GOOO read it and don’t forget to come back. It’s a short read and I promise you will laugh so hard, you may pee yourself. Just warning you.
Have you ever been sitting in traffic and had your foot on the brake so long that suddenly you are afraid you aren’t pushing hard enough? And that at any minute your foot might fall asleep and you will crash into the car in front of you? And all the sudden your leg starts to shake and you start to think “Oh my god I am going to cream the car in front of me and we aren’t even moving!” No? Oh, ok, maybe it’s just me.
You know how some days you look in the mirror and you think “eh Christ, today I look like shit! Gah!” and then the rest of the day you feel like it’s totally your ‘Ugly’ Day? Yeah, well I have been doing that every day for the last like 2 years. I am thinking of removing the mirrors from my house.
That would be most rough on Monkey though, because that boy LOVES to look at himself. He even flirts with himself. It’s so hilarious. And it’s not just mirrors, it’s ANY reflection. He sees himself in the TV and he will run by staring at himself laughing. And run back again. Over and over. He is nuts.
I had a dream Friday night that I was having an ultrasound performed and I said to the tech, “Hey! There are two babies!” and she said “oh well look at that! There sure is! Looks like twins!”
And that’s all I can remember. That and that when I was looking at the ultrasound monitor, the babies looked like a drawing and not like a sonograph picture. Very weird.
But I can’t get it out of my head. Are twins in our future? I am trying not to get my hopes up. But we are going to try again, with our doctors go ahead, on my next cycle. Which should be right about Christmas day if I am calculating right. Actually, I would start injections Christmas eve. IF of course my body does what it is supposed to do. With the help of all the drugs they are giving me of course. *grin*
I don’t want to get my hopes up but my gut says that I will get pregnant. That of course leads into the next question… will I stay pregnant this time. PCOS is such a beast. GRRR *Pout*.
Hubby was gone all weekend on a fishing trip and I took the opportunity to start redoing our house. Since it appears that we are going to be here for a while and not heading home to Colorado like I had hoped, I have decided to make some changes around here. For starters, I want to redo our living room. Our furniture is old and it is starting to feel like you are sitting on marble, not on a soft squishy couch. I am going to miss it but… not that much.
I am also going to start redecorating other parts of the house. Like Monkey’s room and the master bedroom. I can’t paint because we rent, but I am going to get some paint out and touch up some of the nicks and marks that we have put on the walls. And by *we* I mean *the boys*!
This weekend I started reorganizing all over the house. I am Queen of the Label Maker. All Hail Label Maker. Amen.
So I labeled the kitchen cupboards and some of my office stuff so far.
I also decided that I had enough of those damn ants. So, I actually sprayed some bug spray. *gasp* I know, I know. They may move elsewhere, but I am going to take my chances!! Those little nasty shits have spent enough time in my house! I am fed UP! And so far it seems to have worked.
I am seriously considering calling the Bug Killer Owner Guy and chewing him out. I paid him $70 and all I got were bugs! I went to Walmart and spent $3.95 and my ant problem is solved. Ponder that!
For some reason I am addicted to 80’s music the last week or so. I can’t get enough. And as luck would have it, we have an 80’s radio station here. Awesome! And even MORE lucky is the fact that Monkey LOVES it!! He dances all over the room. It’s so cute!! I am trying to get a video of him.
It’s weird though, because for a Photographers kid, he is oddly camera shy. *shrug*
Well, I am ALLLLLL about the lame blogs lately, aren’t I?
Click here to check out today’s Daily Photo Blog… Ruff Daily Photo Blog
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Dear Huge Zits on my Face,
Apparently you missed the Memo. You are supposed to be attaching yourself to a helpless teenager. Not to my wrinkles. Nnnkay?
Seriously. This is getting old.
Feeling 13 again, and not a good way,
Cass
——————————————–
Dear Chocolate,
STOP! Seriously! Stop tempting me. Do you see what you are doing to my face?!?!
GAWWWWD!
You suck! (But taste oh so good)
Cass
——————————————–
Dear Monkey,
Please. For Mama? PLEASE! Start talking. Not only am I worried about you not talking because of your age, but I am SERIOUSLY over the whining and grunting to get everything you want. It’s making me grouchy. So please. TALK. k?
Love you baby but I got a VERY short fuse,
Mama
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Dear Cass,
You are going to have a nervous breakdown if you don’t learn how to mellow out a little big. You have been complaining of PMS for over two weeks now. And even though it is possible, it’s getting a little OLD. Get a fuse. Go to Sams or Costco and get a HUGE one if you must. But for all of us, get one!
That vein seriously looks like it’s gonna pop,
Self
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Dear Hubby,
Hope you enjoy your weekend away fishing. Be safe and catch a lot.
Wishing I had the same draw the water did.
Disgruntled,
Wife
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Dear Stats,
Why am I suddenly only getting like 50 reads a day when last week I was getting over 200?
Starting to get a complex,
Cass
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Dear Readers,
Time to play along! To participate in Dear So and So just click here to go to Kat’s Blog and get the button for your page. To participate in Letters of Intent, click here to visit Julie, over at Foursons and grab one of those buttons too!
Have a fantastic weekend!!!
Xoxo
Becoming a parent is an awe inspiring, beautiful journey that has its high roads and its low roads. It can make you a better person. It can make you a smarter person. It changes you inside and out. Sometimes it can even make you start to question things in life.
Things like:
Ok that last one made me weepy. Being a mother has made me soft. Lol
What things have you questioned since you became a parent?
Have a fantastic day!
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Well, bad news. My brain is on sabbatical… again. Even though the last time I demanded requested that it not take vacation without written consent. This is getting to be too much. If this keeps up, I am going to have to give it the pink slip and put an ad in the paper. *sigh*
It’s like it doesn’t even care about being a team player. This is not the kind of show I am running here. *humph*
Actually I think I may know why it up and skipped out on me.
It could be the cold medicine. I want to leave my body too.
So clearly I am now sick. I am actually taking a quick break from sleeping all day to post this FANTASTIC little blog. Because I am hopelessly addicted to blogging I missed y’all so much. 
So yes the hubby got me sick. *pout*
This is what it is like for me to be sick vs. when Hubby gets sick.
Just sayin.
LOL
I am going to go lay back down and hope that Hubby comes in and rubs my head to say “poor little bunneh”
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
It is time for another “Not me” Monday. Time where I make it clear the things that did Not happen to me in the last week. Feel free to click on the link above to read other “Not Me” Confessionals… errr… Not really.
It was not me who took my kid out first thing in the morning to get a pick me up Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte. It was then totally not me who stopped to chat with the neighbor and then lied to the neighbor when he asked “are those your sleep clothes?” by saying “no, ahem, they are just our lounge clothes” ignoring the fact that be surely noticed the sheep on my pajama pants and the footie pajamas on Monkey. That is something I would NEVER do!
It was not me who let Monkey eat Cup-o-Noodles and Cheese Balls* exclusively because I didn’t want to listen to him scream and pitch a fit. But it was not Monkey who was trying to mimic me after watching me blow on his noodles to cool them off.
He did this between each bite. It was SO CUTE!!
*Yes, Carma, we are still eating the same batch of Cheese Balls that I bought how long ago?? HaHa
It was not me that tried for 20 minutes, through screams, kicking and crying to try and put a monkey costume on my Monkey perhaps just for the photo op.
In my defense, this pic was actually taken when we got the costume a month or so ago. He obviously loved it just as much then as he did on Halloween. Yay for Monkey Costume! 
So I guess it was not me who finally gave up and just went to Johnny Carino’s instead. And it was not me who let Monkey have spaghetti at Johnny Carino’s even though I knew it would end up all over everything and the busboy would be cursing me when we left.
nom nom nom nom nom
It was not me who was giggling while Hubby was getting a 6 inch Q-tip shoved up his nose to test him for the flu. And it was not me who decided to document this moment for him forever and ever.
So cute, isn’t he? He always sticks his tongue out at cameras. Paparazzi and all.
Oh and it is sooooo not me who is PRAYING so hard that I don’t have to get the same Q-Tip treatment if this cold doesn’t go away. *gulp*
It was not me who stayed in bed this morning for an extra 30 minutes even though I could see Monkey on the monitor pulling EVERYTHING out of the dresser drawers. But hey, 30 minutes is 30 minutes y’all. Don’t judge.
What things were not you this week?
Make sure to link up if you blog “not me” Monday.
